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  • Writer's pictureJulie Kavanagh

There'll be no prom for my kids

There'll be no prom for my kids, and that's just fine

I have a confession to make: there will be no prom for my kids. Now, before you raise your eyebrows and start questioning my parenting choices, let me explain. It's not because I'm a "woke" parent, as you might assume. It's a result of a series of circumstances that have shaped their lives.

I have documented well that my kids are Adopted and can no longer attend school. My children spent 4 long years in the care of the state. It took an eternity for the Local Authority and the Court Judge to grant us their Adoption Order, providing them with the permanency they desperately needed. But this prolonged delay left the kids with deep scars. Coupled with their early experiences and a dire failure of a mainstream school that boasted about being "outstanding" whilst repeatedly failing to meet the needs of Care Experienced pupils, my kids quickly crumbled under the weight of it all.

So my kids now have to miss out on the usual school experiences like day trips, residential adventures, and, yes, the infamous prom. During a recent trip to the hairdressers, where other girls were getting their hair updos in their prom dresses, one of my children asked me what a prom was.

I proceeded to explain the concept, how it's not just about the clothes you wear but also about making a grand entrance, complete with all the bells and whistles. That's when my eldest shot back with a dry wit that only teenagers can muster, saying, "Why bother? You know what, Mum, I'd just walk."

And in that moment, it hit me. One of the most incredible things about my kids not being in school is that they have absolutely no concept of peer pressure. They are blissfully unaware of the relentless pressure to be cool, to wear designer labels, and to have the latest trends. By not succumbing to peer pressure, they become the epitome of coolness among their peers. They are relaxed and confident enough to know that they are enough just as they are.

I love them for it. I love that they don't feel the need to conform or chase after superficial validation. In a world that's so obsessed with appearances and fitting in, they stand out by simply being themselves. They've unintentionally mastered the art of being unapologetically authentic, and that, my friends, is something truly special.

So while they may miss out on the grandeur and glamour of prom night, I wouldn't trade their freedom from peer pressure for anything in the world. I'll cherish their carefree spirits and their ability to find contentment within themselves. No prom? No problem. My kids are already the coolest cats in town, and that's all that matters.


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